Dear people who are considering getting back together with their ex’s,
Relationships on IMVU can be tricky to say the least. A good chunk of individuals tend to go back to there ex’s if things ended well or sometimes if it didn’t. Take me for example, I was with someone on IMVU and it was good for the first year, then said person, let’s call this person Jamie, didn’t show up anymore for another 6 months, I presumed we had broken up because Jamie’s profile said “Single” so I changed mine. During those six months I was single, and somewhere in the seventh month I found someone. Jamie comes back claiming that he/she “wants me back.”
Reviving past relationships can be the best thing ever or a grave mistake. While it’s of course impossible to predict the future and find out if being together the second time will work out and everything with be A-Okay. There are a few ways to make a more… knowledgeable decision. How? Ask yourself the following questions below, HONESTLY.
Are you positive this will not be another Déjà vu?
Get a pen and a paper, or a laptop, write or type down the pros and cons o you two being together, and what make both go banana split in the first place you’re your relationship was torn apart because of the following: timing, distance, parental disapproval, then a good, successful re-blossom can happen… again once these factors are out of the mix. However if you both broke up for cheating, anger issues, the general “it’s not you its me?” or you just do not get along— it can be very tricky. Another question in this section is, do you think its possible that you both can overcome these problems? Sure, but you got to work at! Which brings us to…
Dropping the baggage.
Are you willing to ditch the baggage? Some can hold grudges if things end messily. If things ended messily, it’s safe to assume that one of you still holds some sort of grudge. (Hey, you’re only human!) To be able to try again, you have to be able to leave all those problems behind and turn a new leaf or at least have a healthy discussion about how you plan to avoid them this time around. An open discussion can help prevent those problems from flaring up again. You don’t want to apologize for the same wrong doings that set you apart in the first place! Another question you must ask after dropping the baggage is…
Are you doing this for the right reasons?
You know how the saying goes, “fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me… for not beating your ass the first time!” No… kidding but seriously, this is a question that I cannot stress how much you should ponder it! Getting together for the right reasons is crucial! Yes, reasons like, “he/she is hot or cute, he/she can cook well, he/she is rich, because your friends like you two together,” are NOT good reasons! You need really dig deep to figure out if you want this person in your life again. Overcoming heartbreak is an incredible achievement and falling back into the same routine as before can hurt you, maybe a lot worst than the first time. Remember YOU ARE MAKING THIS DECISION not your friends or your lustful desires. Take all into consideration and really find a solid argument as to why you two should try again. Now when it comes to staying together….
Are you settling? (Be honest!)
If for any reason at all, the words “I don’t want to be single” come to play when you ask yourself why you want to be with this person or why you want to settle down, be EXTREMELY cautious! Why? Because it is not only your feelings and emotions that are at stake, leading someone on just so you can have “cuddle bear” at night will surely to hurt said person deeply. Spending your time with someone you’re not into is never fun! Lastly…
Are you so happy you can’t stand it?
The happiness bug, did it get to you? It’s good to be over the moon with bliss, but remember to be patient; it’s also difficult to pick up where you left off in a relationship with your ex. It is a process you will need to take a few steps back, pause, find your groove and keep on going. Bask in the sort-of-new relationship glow, and take comfort in knowing you made the decision that’s right for you.
MELROSE 