How to confront your unfaithful partner: If there is a calm environment that you two can speak in, go for it (A serene calm place). Most women want to go ape-shit crazy on their partners when they find out about the cheating but that only makes matters worse. Do not do that. REMAIN CALM, COOL AND COLLECTED. (The 3 C’s) Here are some helpful ways to confront your partner:

• Make sure you don’t just have suspicions but you have evidence to back it up!

• If you plan on snooping don’t let your partner catch you. Be coy about it!

Do NOT allow your partner to turn tables on you: Once confronted with facts, they will try to pull a Jedi Mind Trick on you by calling you crazy, stupid, psycho, insecure, childish, petty, ridiculous, looking for trouble or trying to start something.They will do all this before they answer your question so they throw you off. Don’t feed into it! Just say yes to all they call you and persist on with your question! “Yeah, I’m crazy. In fact I’m loco! So tell me who she is and how long have you two been screwing around?” Never allow the Jedi Mind Trick!

No explanations: Do not allow them explain their behavior. Why? Because it gives them a chance to change your mind and make you rationalize with the idea that they would never cheat on you when they did. Typical things the unfaithful partner may say are: “Why would I continue a relationship with my ex when you know how important you are to me?” or “Why would I have an affair with someone at work when I know your sister/cousin/ best friend/dog works there?” or even, “Why would I do that to you when you know how much I love you?” when a cheater is caught up in the affair, normal, rational thinking is replaced by whatever selfish behavior is necessary to accomplish their goals.

Don’t get fooled by the tears: Again it’s another trick! “I’m sorry.” “I didn’t mean to do it.” “I got tempted. Please forgive me.” Don’t fall for it! Don’t console them. Leave them to cry a long while, before consoling them, that way you know if they are sincere or false. Remember, YOU ARE THE VICTIM here! Not your partner!They will try to make it about them but it should not be about them, it is about you and you alone!

Do not tell your partner who told you this information: Tell your partner you found out on your own and no one else helped you. They will try suggesting friends you know; “It was Laurel wasn’t it, she told you about it!” “I know its Brittney she’s been telling you things about me ever since you became friends!” Don’t do him/her any favors by spilling your source. It’s common sense! Girl code and all that shenanigans!

It stays between you two: Do not include family or friends in your decision making as to whether to stay together or not. Honestly family and friends can have biased thoughts and will only tell you what they think is best for you but really they will not understand what is best for you. You are the only one who knows that. Keep friends and family out of it.

Is it over? There is no certainty whether you want to end it or not. You can always recover a relationship by setting some ground rules. “Whoever it is you were with, you are ending it now. I’m your girlfriend/boyfriend there is no room for anyone else. We are exclusive.” It sounds demanding but you have every right to demand this, seeing as you’re the one who was wronged. If you love him/her and you think… no scratch that. You know things can be resolved then forgive them.

Most of us women like to think that we can change a man. WE CANNOT! Like the old saying goes, you can take a horse to the lake but you can’t force it to drink! I say you should communicate and if that doesn’t work then leave. Not having a relationship will not kill you. Learn to be independent and fierce!  Get your groove back because a lot of people just like my friend lose their identity, all because they are in love with someone.
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Is not my boyfriend. Just an awesome dude.

So calm your tits.

SHOP Gradennn! He’s got good stuff!


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